Blog
The Rearview Mirror Effect:A Guide to Self-Forgiveness
A few years ago, my family took a vacation to Gatlinburg, TN. It was late in the day and everyone was tired from a long day of driving. The kids were screaming in the back seat. “No, you stop touching me! He’s looking at me. Dad, he won’t leave me alone.” My wife was reading… Read More
Break the Chains of Resentment
Disclaimer: I want to give full gravity to how difficult, maybe impossible, the thought of forgiveness may feel. When deep-seated hurt is present, forgiving those who hurt you may be the last thing that you want to do. This article will address some strong realities about the dangers of living with unforgiveness as well as… Read More
The Imposter Within Does Not Have to Win
Two colleagues work side by side every day at the same office in the same position. Gina seems to have her life completely together. She is beautiful, poised, and confident. Cynthia wishes she had half of Gina’s charisma and natural ability to lead. All day, Cynthia thinks to herself, Is today the day when people… Read More
Diffusing the Stress Bomb: Part 3
Over the past 2 weeks, I have been sharing the importance of our mindset and our proactive self-care for maintaining sanity during stressful times. Today, I want to share 3 immediate practical strategies that you can use right where you are, right now, even in the middle of your stress. How do I know that… Read More
Diffusing the Stress Bomb: Part 2
In my last blog post, I likened stress to the fuse of a bomb that is burning toward an explosion. I discussed 3 thought shifts that can help you see the world more clearly, removing the negative filter you place on the world, and diffusing that bomb. In this post, I want to give you… Read More
Diffusing the Stress Bomb: Part 1
Over the last several weeks, I have been talking about improving relational connections in the family. Last week, I discussed reactions versus responses and the correlation between our behaviors and our outcomes when we experience stress. After writing Connecting Through Correcting, one of my readers posed the question about how to maintain control when we… Read More
Emotional Physics
Reactions vs. Responses You may remember studying Isaac Newton’s Laws of Motion: The same principals apply to emotions as well. You see what I did there? Emotional Inertia: Have you ever noticed how long it takes for you to calm down when you lose your temper? At the same time, when you are calm, challenging… Read More
Connecting Through Correcting
The Kid Connection: Part 5 How many times have you heard a GPS say, “Recalculating” when you chose not to obey the directions? Parenting is much like this because children frequently need redirection. Punishment vs. Discipline 2 Options Punishment is deterring behavior by creating discomfort. Results: Discipline is teaching effective self-management and effective interpersonal skills…. Read More
Connecting Through Communicating
The Kid Connection: Part 4 Verbal Charades: Communication is certainly easier when we use words. But that’s not the whole story. My youngest son is 5 years old, and very sweet (sometimes). He was in speech therapy, and while he’s progressing well, some sounds are still problematic A few months ago, he was telling us… Read More
Connecting Through Comforting
The Kid Connection: Part 3 Poor Mr. Wiggles: Last spring, I got up early one Saturday morning to mow my overgrown lawn. I was trying to hurry because I knew that the weatherman had forecasted storms with high winds that afternoon and evening. My 4-year-old son and my 7-year-old daughter came outside to play while… Read More
Connecting Through Caring
The Kid Connection: Part 2 In the last post, I introduced 4 C’s of connecting with your children: CARING, COMFORTING, COMMUNICATING, AND CORRECTING. This post is going to focus on parental caring for our kids. Feeling unconditionally cared for by parents develops a strong parent-child bond. What Speaks Love? In the book, The 5 Love… Read More
Building the Connection
The Kid Connection Series: Part 1 In my last series, Creating Safety in Relationships, I discussed many important steps to establishing healthy adult relationships among partners. The parental relationship sets the tone for the family atmosphere. But what about parenting? Most of my early parent training was based in behaviorism. This basically means that… Read More